the art of leading

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There is an ongoing discussion over at Leadership Turn, in the post Leaders who DON’T: politicians, which I think is of interest to many readers of The Art of Leading. It states what many people know to be true: there is little, if any, true political leadership in the U.S. and abroad. Standard  politicians nowadays and true leaders act upon very different priorities. Namely, the politicians just want to get elected and let that cloud their judgment (even many well-intentioned ones, I’m afraid) while true leaders care about their values and ideals more than they do about elections. There are alternatives, but each one requires ACTION, and not every one involves politics:

• Social entrepreneurship
• Think tanks
• Not-for-profits
• Philanthropy
• Pressure groups (not lobbyists)
• Etc.

Please, for the sake of whatever country you are from, and of society’s well-being, act on your passions and overcome politics.

Categories : Politics // Add Comment »

Your ideas will face opposition in any field of life. Do you want to prove to your boss why you deserve that raise? Do you want to convince that friend of yours to lend you the money you need to start your dream business? Then you need to get those ideas heard and supported. How do you do that? By knowing how to argue. Here are some tips on how to argue.

1. State your objective. Some arguments start out of nothing, and have no purpose other than just ‘winning’. When you state your objective for arguing, you make it clear for yourself and the other party what the discussion is about. If you are honest in doing this, it also shows genuinity
2. Be concise. Most people don’t appreciate others going on about irrelevant details.
3. Be nice. I don’t mean “smile at all moments” type of nice, but at least don’t make others hate you. Don’t try to force the other party to like you, but don’t make it hard for them either.
4. Exude confidence. It’s much easier for people to listen to others who are sure of themselves and who believe in their positions. This also transmits credibility, and being perceived as honest is essential to prevail in an argument.
5. Know when to stop arguing. Don’t ramble about unnecessary or irrelevant details. State your case, and close. Going on after you’ve made your point could just make you unlikeable.

Categories : Communication, Negotiation, Persuasion // Add Comment »

Tim and Bob are both junior executives in a big corporation. Both are faced with the same situation: Their boss has signed a particular contract, which is pretty clearly a waste of resources in their eyes. But their boss is 100% convinced that she’s doing the right thing. Tim and Bob both are 100% convinced that she’s wrong. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a difficult case in our hands. This is how Tim and Bob each go about in trying to convince the boss that she’s wrong.

1. Tim goes right up to the boss and, with an obvious air of superiority (thinking, “how dumb are you! I’m right, you’re wrong.”). “We all know that you’re making a terrible decision. This is a total waste of money.”
2. Bob knows his boss is a hardheaded person, who normally takes other people’s advice lightly. He makes an appointment with his boss and courteously chats about the contract. “I hope you’re making the right decision. I trust in your judgment, since you’ve already proved to us that you have the company’s best interests in mind. However, since the moment you announced the contract I became aware of some numbers I thought you should know…bla bla bla.”

So who is a better ‘arguer’ then?

Well, wait a minute there before you answer. We first need to answer this:

WHY do we argue?

Let me give you a short answer: To get things done. Not just to ‘be heard’, but to accomplish something concrete.

So with that in mind, who is more likely to get something done? Who is more likely to make the boss reconsider her previous decision? Tim or Bob? I’d have to put my money on Bob. His priority was to keep his boss’s and the company’s best interest at hand. He didn’t shout and thrash about, but I’m pretty sure he was able to disarm the boss and get his point across. Tim, on the other hand, had eliminated his chances for prevailing from the moment he entered the door, before even opening his mouth. His attitude problem talked more clearly than his words: “I’m better than you, and I know more than you.” Who will react positively to that?!

So go ahead, don’t be afraid to argue. We all need to get ideas across, and get things done. But please, don’t argue merely for the sake of “winning”, whatever that means.

P.S. The next post will provide some pointers on “how to argue”. Stay tuned.

Categories : Uncategorized // 1 Comment »

The Art of Leading is back. Life circumstances didn’t allow me to post regularly (almost nothing at all). But from now on I’ll be aiming to post three high-quality articles per week. Happy (late) New Year! Please keep visiting for new, reinvigorated content.

Categories : Uncategorized // Add Comment »

EIGHT STEPS TO FINDING AND CREATING THE WORK YOU LOVE

By Brian Kurth, author of Test-Drive Your Dream Job

Many of us are still trying to figure out what we want to be when we grow up.  We may have good jobs and nice paychecks, but we are not really happy in our work.  We daydream about the “what if’s” in our life and long for the chance to discover and explore the job of our dreams.  Identifying your dream job and the path that will take you there is both a challenge and an opportunity.  But by following a realistic step-by-step “vocationing” process, you can pursue your interests and passions to the job of your dreams. 

1. Define Your Dream Job(s)

What are your passions and your interests? What activities give you a sense of purpose and satisfaction? Can you envision yourself in a job that fully engages your heart and your mind? You may still be trying to figure out what you want to be when you grow up.  That’s okay. The “vocationing” process gives you the opportunity to explore, experiment, and discover what your dream job is and how to pursue it.

2. Address Your Fears

Financial instability, family disruption, giving up an identity, failing at something new.  These are all fears that may stand in the way of pursuing your dream job. The biggest thing you can do to get past these fears is to meet them head-on. Bring these deepest fears to light and examine them with reason; talk about them; play each one out to its most irrational end. What is the worst thing that could happen?

3. Do Your Research

Internal and external research helps you discover who you are and what kind of work meshes with your deepest self. Do your homework and access resources ranging from the Internet to one-on-one contact with people on-the-job to determine if what you think is your dream job, truly is your dream job.  

4. Find a Mentor

Inspirational, experienced, realistic, forthcoming and optimistic.  A good mentor is all of these things and eager to help someone else get started.  Recruiting a mentor who is a good match for you requires following a plan of action, asking the right questions, and building a relationship that is mutually satisfying.  Having a mentor is the crux to the vocationing process.  Whether you’re 20-something, 30-something, 40-something, 50-something or even 60-something, you need a mentor!   

5. Test Drive Your Dream Job

There’s no better way to learn than by doing. Test-driving your dream job with a mentor provides a hands-on experience that has the potential to change your life. This is the opportunity to learn as much as possible about the job, how you feel about the day-to-day activities, and what it takes to succeed.  Whether your mentorship proves your perceived dream job is indeed your dream job or if it is a reality check illuminating that the job is not the one of your dreams, the mentorship experience gives you the required personal and professional due diligence you need prior to making a career decision.

6. Create an Action Plan

Pursuing a dream job is less a leap than a series of incremental steps that move you closer to your goal. What is critical to reaching that goal is making sure the steps you follow are the right ones. An action plan is needed.  If you make a list of all the things you need to learn and do in order to realize your dream job, you will have mapped out a plan for moving ahead.  A knowledgeable action plan provides you with the power to forge ahead.

7. Establish Thresholds

The biggest reason we pursue our dream job is to increase our life satisfaction. It is important to understand how much risk, challenge, and uncertainty you can tolerate before the life satisfaction goal becomes blurred by the process.  The vocationing process is as much about what you learn on the journey as the rewards when you reach your destination.

8. Think Big, Start Small

You don’t have to quit your nine-to-five job to pursue your dream job. Obligations and concerns may take you down a less-than-direct path.  It may take months, not weeks….years, not months. If you are patient and creative, you can keep your career transition moving forward. The vocationing process will get you from Point A to Point B.

Brian Kurth is the founder of VocationVacations and the author of “Test-Drive Your Dream Job”  Kurth is a sought after expert on how to pursue and attain one’s dream job.  He has shared his wit and wisdom in appearances on NBC’s TODAY Show, CNN, and FOX News, and has been featured in articles in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal and Fortune Magazine.  Many more regularly turn to Brian for his comments, advice and insights.  A native of Madison, Wisconsin, Kurth lives in Portland, Oregon.

Categories : Uncategorized // Add Comment »

I came across an article I think is helpful. Perhaps the best way to read it is to use it as a checklist for self-improvement tasks if you find that you fall into one of the 10 signs.

10 Signs That You Aren’t Cut Out To Be A Project Manager 

Categories : Project Management // Add Comment »

Common wisdom and tradition suggest, roughly, the following steps when negotiating:

1. Divide the issue into manageable portions or sub-issues.

2. Among those sub-issues, find common ground.

3. Concentrate your efforts on finding solutions to those specific issues that were found in the common ground.

4. Choose the preferred alternative.

There is nothing wrong with this approach. In fact, it’s a very savvy way to go about in negotiating something. The basic principle behind this approach is that “together we can make a difference”. In other words, that the key to solving a dispute is to focus on what unites the parties, instead of what divides them.

Find un-common, not common, ground

What is often overlooked, though, is the difference in interest-level among different issues. I’m not referring here to the difference in postures regarding one particular issue. What I’m talking about is the difference in the values that each party assigns to specific topics. Let me explain.

Normally, negotiations cover a range of issues simultaneously. The nature of negotiations will require that one party concede some things in order to obtain others. The objective of each party, of course, is to have their way on most of those issues.

People assign different values to different things

But human nature and experience points to the fact that both sides won’t assign the exact same value and importance level to the exact same issues. One party will grant more importance to some topics than to others. And, that same party won’t care as much about some other topics.

So what is the significance of this small, obvious, but sometimes overlooked fact?

Well, feelings can provide for pretty good negotiation chips. Giving the benefit of the doubt on each issue to the party that most strongly feels about each particular issue will give you some leeway in getting something in return.

The key is to solve each “special high-interest” issue in favor of the party that most strongly feels about it. That way, each party achieves a “victory” without the negotiation being a zero-sum game, where one side loses when the other wins.

Get the other side to concede

The opposing party will be more willing to concede on an issue that is not too high on its priority list than if it was a very important issue for him or her. On the other side of the coin, if you granted that relatively insignificant (for you) chip, you may have created an opportunity to receive another chip in return that, while not too important for the opponent, is very important to you.

Granted, this is an oversimplified explanation. Many factors beyond the scope of this article will complicate things, making it difficult to settle a negotiation just by using this tactic. But many sub-issues of a negotiation will be more easily settled by seeking these “interest-level” opportunities.

So what changes would I make to the traditional negotiation steps?

Not many, just #2 and #3, as follows:

1. Divide the issue into manageable portions or sub-issues.

2. Among those sub-issues, find differences between the parties in terms of interest level toward each sub-issue.

3. Concentrate your efforts on finding solutions to those specific issues in which the interest level between parties varied.

4. Choose the preferred alternative.

Happy Negotiation!

Categories : Negotiation // 3 Comments »

Wanting to be a leader is a very significant step in your personal development. But if wanting is all that you do, then you’ll stay there and there will be no actual leadership to talk about. You may have a grand life-altering vision of the future, but if others don’t see it too, then that vision will never come true. So the logical action step to take after having formulated that goal would be to COMMUNICATE YOUR VISION. Only then will you be able to start shaping it into reality. Arnold Shwarzenneger, in his book The Education of a Bodybuilder, told the story of how, as a teenager, he visualized himself in front of a great audience after winning the Mr. Universe bodybuilding competition. He imagined himself as a movie star. Now, you may not agree with his politics, or you may not like his movies, but he took action. He won the Mr. Universe, he won the Mr. Olympia, he became a movie star, and he became Governor of California. How did he do this? Well, he definitely hit the gym religiously and took steps to meet people in Hollywood. But he is also known as a great communicator. He took care of expressing his goals and of making the world know what he was up to. Arnold built a true cult-like following, especially in the bodybuilding arena, that helped him to make his vision a reality. How can you duplicate those results in your own scope of influence will be the topic of the remainder of this article.

Communicate through listening

The most overlooked, but perhaps the most important, method of communication is listening. The other three are reading, writing, and talking. But those three are more than polished throughout life. That is precisely why listening skills are so important. By being a good listener you’ll be able to find many ideas to implement your action plan, that you wouldn’t have thought of yourself. You’ll be ahead of your ‘competition’, since most people don’t listen. That’s the purpose of team-building, though that would take a whole other article to expand upon. Listening is also a central part of gaining followers. Everyone likes being listened to. When you show interest in what the other person expresses, that person will be much more open to the idea of listening in turn to what you have to say. That skill sets you apart from most other people whom are simply cut off simply because they talk too much and don’t listen.

Communicate through your own actions

You can talk all you want and try to communicate solely through that method. In fact, appropriate speaking skills are very helpful to leaders who desire to communicate their visions. But if you turn around and do the opposite of what you preach, your message will be lost. “Do as I say not as I do” will not work. It’s easier for people to imitate physical actions than it is for people to go through a thought process in order to determine the ‘correctness’ of what they hear. It follows one of the most essential theories in nature: “the path of least resistance”. Don’t get me wrong, that thought process is essential in order to become a discerning human being. But it’s tough! For that reason, the most efficient way to communicate your vision is through your own actions. Become an embodiment of that vision, and soon others will copy that behavior. Don’t get too caught up in trying to be the most eloquent speaker in the world, although that certainly would be nice. When speaking, try to stir people into action, and show people how it is done instead of merely telling them.

Communicate through your own attitudes

This element of communication is somewhat tied to the previous one. Nevertheless, it is of supreme importance that you always carry a positive attitude. Again, attitudes are contagious. Haven’t you ever been very happy only to encounter a negative person and have that person ruin your day? You should develop the ability to avoid that, but it’s not easy. In the other hand, if you always carry yourself in a positive light, people are more open to imitating your actions. When they see you are convinced that your vision is worth striving for, they’ll start believing in it too, or at least be more susceptible.

Let others reach their own conclusions

Proper communication will lead people to reach conclusions. Your role as a leader is to provide all the resources that are necessary for others to make a decision for themselves. You can’t force anyone to accept your message. You may be able to make someone do something for you if you use threats, but that will only be temporary. As Dale Carnegie stated in his classic book How to Win Friends and Influence People if your communication strategy is appropriate, people will want to follow you. That is what is known as persuasion and it’s what leadership is all about. By persuading, you influence. And that is every leader’s objective.

Categories : Communication // Add Comment »

Why is it that time passes by so fast when we’re reading a great book? There’s something about it that just enthralls you into a hypnotic state of mind and sort of fall into a deep trance. When you wake up, you’re done with the book. Time was accelerated. You rode a spaceship through a black hole and ended up somewhere else, and someTIME else.

The same thing can be said about exceptional leaders. You are embedded within their ideas. You are invited to capture those ideas. A short time later you find yourself totally entranced by the shadow that they cast.

You feel what the leader feels, in the same way that a great author makes you feel what a character in the book is feeling. Or what the author himself is feeling. You let yourself go, and the leader, or the author, catches you in his or her arms to direct you. To direct you with your permission. To direct you with your complete willingness. Because you’re in their trance.

Just ask the following question to anyone who has followed such a unique leader, especially in the workplace: What was it like to work for him? I’m pretty sure a big chunk will automatically enter a trance-like state and start reminiscing of the time they spent under the leader’s wings.

They will smile and tell you, “Time passed so quickly. I would’ve loved to work for her for a longer time.”

Leaders are like books. The great ones will make time pass quickly. They will teach you life-changing lessons. They will leave you yearning for more. Poor ones will be a bore. You’ll find them tedious and insignificant. They will leave you in a state of exhaustion.

Readers will create very vivid images in their minds as the book develops. Authors created those images. Followers of a great leader will be full of creative ideas that solve problems for an organization. Leaders created those ideas.

The reason why so many authors have created revolutions, trends, and movements, I believe is due to their ability to create images in the minds of readers. They may be violent, or enjoyable, or sad, or happy, or peaceful, or calm, or quiet, or loud. But readers act out, sometimes in a subconscious way, these ideas and images. And as a result, revolutions happen. Or inventions are inspired. Or  controversies are sparked.

So to become a great leader, become a great author first. Create images in the minds of followers that will move them to act. Move people through ideas, as an author does. Make time pass by in the blink of an eye. Be an author of greatness.

Categories : Confidence, General Leadership, Goals, Personal Development, Relationships // Add Comment »

Generally, every great leader has one trait that stands out from the others. They have one characteristic that identifies them. It may be related to personality, or to leadership style, or to other areas. What many of these leaders understand that many don’t is that the way you naturally are can be used to your advantage. It is true that you should always strive for improvement and development of skills you don’t have. If you are so timid that you aren’t able to communicate, then you have a problem. You won’t be able to communicate your vision! But even if you improve that area of your life and find the courage to meet new people and have a healthy social life, you might still be a reserved person. There isn’t anything wrong with that. It took a while for me to accept that being a reserved person didn’t mean I was doomed to obscurity. Granted, I have learned how to better cope with my timidity. I realized it was holding me back in many areas. But that doesn’t mean I have to be insincere to myself as to who I really am! Learn how to embrace your true self and use your personality to your advantage as a leader. But before doing that, you need to identify what characteristic you naturally have, that may be used as your leadership ‘brand’. I recommend you ask yourself the following questions to accomplish that:

How do you solve problems?

The answer to this question may tell you a lot about your personality. When a problematic situation arises, do you prefer to go by your gut instincts to solve it? Or do you carefully gather the facts, analyze the situation and try to build consensus? Do you prefer that nobody gets hurt? Or are you totally oblivious to the consequences that your decision might have? There is no right or wrong question. Every style has its place, depending upon the situation. Neither are they exclusive of the other answer. Sometimes styles may be synergistic. But generally, most people lean toward one side more than the other. You should discover, if it’s not already obvious to you, which are your inclinations. Stay mindful of that, and trust your style.

What are you passionate about?

Your passions may communicate a lot about you. Obviously, nobody is defined by their interests or hobbies. But they’re pretty good signs. Perhaps your free time revolves around finding out the best way to jump out of an airplane in mid-flight. I might be inclined to think that you’re comfortable with taking significant risks. That attitude could definitely be an asset when acting as a leader!

What do you think you’re good at?

Your skills in various areas of life may be symbolic of characteristics you could use to develop yourself as a leader. For example, a person may be a brilliant robot-builder. Maybe that person is detail-oriented. Detail-oriented leaders definitely have a role to play in society. I understand this may be too broad of a generalization, but you should use this as a guideline.

What do others think about you?

Most times people overestimate themselves. Other times people may ignore a very positive characteristic they have. That is where family, friends, and perhaps even complete strangers come into play. Others may see things you don’t. Try to ask them about what they think you are good at. Ask them about your negative characteristics. If they’re honest and trustful, they should be of great help in assisting you in discovering potential leadership strengths.

Develop that strength

Warren Buffet, the great investor, was capable of using one very specific characteristic he had to build a multi-billion dollar business like Berkshire Hathaway, Inc., of which he is CEO, and becoming one of the richest men alive. In Buffet: The Making of an American Capitalist, author Roger Lowenstein describes how Buffet was always avert to venturing into unknown territory. Throughout his career, he has made it a central element of his philosophy to never invest in any company he doesn’t understand. That doesn’t mean he stands on the sidelines and doesn’t bother to learn, but he is careful to only invest in companies he fully understands. Another trait he is famous for is his Omaha hospitality. People are drawn to him when he talks because of that. In fact, he has a cult-like following that is characteristic of great leaders. So, once you have a pretty good idea of what are those one or two strong characteristics that are capable of catapulting you into mastering the Art of Leading, focus on them. ‘Brand’ yourself. Make it easy for others to identify you.

Categories : General Leadership, Personal Development // Add Comment »